Archive for November, 2006

Baby MIDDLE Names

Thursday, November 30th, 2006

Tomorrow is a big day: the ultrasound is in the morning, and, if the baby is cooperative, we will find out if it is a girl or a boy. If it is a boy (which I unreasonably expect), he will have his great-grandfather’s name. But if it is a girl, then I transform into Crazy Name Obsessed Pregnant Lady, a role I have played before.

I knew I wanted to name my first baby after my father, so JellyBean’s name was chosen long before she was born. Sweetpea, though in utero we referred to her as “Lily,” went unnamed until I held her in my arms. I had spent a truly unjustifiable amount of time computing the popularity of baby names, and weighing exactly how popular I wanted her name to be. Too unusual, and life gets a little more difficult for a little girl. Too common, and I would end up resenting all those other selfish mothers who dared to use MY name for their children.

Whenever our families asked what we would name Sweetpea, I would answer, “I’ll wait until I see what she looks like.” They did not like this answer, but there wasn’t much they could do about it. I knew I had to choose the name quickly after she was born, because if we called the family and told them a nameless baby was born, they would be very grumpy. So I brought my list of thirty possible girl names to the delivery room, and, as I held that tiny, sweet, blue-eyed girl with the dark, curly hair, I pronounced a few to test them out, and chose.

I noticed that the doctors and nurses found quiet things to do around the delivery room until I made my choice.

As I said, I expect this baby to be a boy, so there will be no agonizing choices to make, but it could be a girl, and then I have a new dilemma: I have never before gone through my obsessive naming exercises while writing a blog. How dreadfully tempting to discuss the options with all of you! But wouldn’t that make the anonymity I have given my other children pointless? I could hardly ask your opinion on names and then NOT tell you which name I chose.

So I have decided on a compromise with myself: I will ask your opinion on middle names. I know parents agonize over middle names sometimes too, but I’ve gradually realized how superfluous they are. Middle names are like a little secret between yourself and whomever you choose to share it with, like the color of your underpants, or which was your favorite Monkee (answer: Mickey). Middle names can be much weirder than first names, and I have much fewer rules for deciding which is the right one.

So here are the contestants for girl baby #3’s middle name, posted tonight because tomorrow the ultrasound may show that baby #3 is certainly a boy, and I will have nothing to dither about.

Aerin (after my favorite of Robin McKinley’s characters)
Anne (as in Shirley - big surprise)
Bennett
Catherine
Claire
Donne (after the poet, who has comforted and taught me on many occasions)
Elinor (after my favorite Jane Austen character)
Helene
Hunter
Irene
Ivy
Jane
Jean
Josephine (of course from Little Women - as if you needed to ask)
Lucille
Mae
Mage
Magdalena (because Mary Magdalene doesn’t get enough credit, or if she does, it’s the wrong kind)
Margaret
Marie
Ruth
Verity
Winifred
Wren

Works-For-Me Wednesday: Pregnancy

Wednesday, November 29th, 2006

Everyone has stuff that gets them through pregnancy. Here are mine:

1. Tank tops with bralets - I hate bra shopping. Hate it, hate it, hate it. And shopping for bras when I am huge and my rib cage is expanding so nothing will fit right is even worse. So during pregnancy I buy (for less than the cost of a bra) those tank-tops with a bra sewn in to wear under my clothing. They don’t offer much support, but I buy them a size too small, which helps, and just wear them under my shirts like a bra. No digging into my skin as I expand, no impossible sizing, and since the straps are elastic, they are even easier than nursing bras to use while breastfeeding.

2. Newman’s Own Salsa - Every pregnancy, this is my number one craving. The first pregnancy, I had been longing for salsa for days. I bought a jar of this, brought it home, and hid in a corner where my husband wouldn’t see me. I ate it out of the jar with a spoon. He found me and has been teasing me about it ever since. But my body needed it. It’s yummy, and it’s full of vegetables. Every pregnancy, I pray blessings upon Paul Newman.

3. Sleeping with my iPod - I have a four year old iPod that barely works anymore. When it dies completely I will mourn. It has been great for those restless pregnant nights. I have a bunch of audiobooks on it, and when I have trouble sleeping, I listen till I’m drowsy, and pop the earbuds out when I’m ready to go to sleep. My favorite go-to-sleep-listening book is Robert Lacey’s Great Tales from English History. It is just interesting enough to keep my attention, but familiar enough to let me fall asleep.

4. Four Pillows - Two under my head, one for my legs and one to support my back as I lie on my side. During my second pregnancy, I told myself this was excessive, and I could make do with three. I ditched the one behind my back. I woke up in the middle of the night with such horrible muscle pain in my chest that I thought I was having a heart attack. I actually went to the emergency room. Now I stick with four.

5. Baby NameVoyager - I am obsessive about choosing baby names. It goes well beyond the bounds of reason. For my first two babies, I made up spread sheets recalculating the popularity rankings of the SSA website based on names of the same etymology. Now I just use NameVoyager. The author’s blog is a great read, too.

You can find more WFMW ideas at Rocks in My Dryer.

The Biggest Fear

Thursday, November 23rd, 2006

Every mother recalls some piece of foolish dogmatism from her pre-mother days. My favorite story is from an old friend who had two daughters. Her first daughter was one of those preternaturally sweet and gentle children who obeys without question or discipline. When this daughter was little, my friend said she frequently looked with disapproval at other mothers and thought, “Why don’t they control their children?”

Then she had her second daughter, a delightful little fireball. Anything this child was commanded not to do, she did. She was unquenchably gleeful in her defiance. She was the kid everyone watched in church, because you knew she was going to do something. She tested every rule, and she giggled while she did it. She was the perfect child to thoroughly flatten any parent’s judgmental certainty. There was no way to have this child and still be pompous about your own parenting.

I had my fireball first. I was full of dogmatic certainty about some things, though mine expressed itself more as shock at other parents than condemnation. I was startled by practices that did not conform to official theories, and suspicious that maybe those parents just were not trying hard enough.

And all that came crashing down the moment I brought JellyBean home.

Sleep was what killed me. JellyBean would not sleep at night. I do not mean she would wake up a lot; I mean she would not sleep. For the entire first month of her life, she stayed wide awake from 10 pm till 6 am. Nothing worked. Nothing.

I have not mentioned this before for obvious reasons, and maybe I will edit it out, but Az works nights. I manage children alone at night. There was no one else to hold her or feed her or rock her. If she was awake, I was awake, all night long. For a month.

At the end of a month, she began to sleep a little at night. I was so grateful. Following the strict instructions of the “Back to Sleep” campaign, I laid her on her back to sleep. But after the first few days, JellyBean decided she would not sleep on her back. She cried and cried. So I introduced one of those wedges under her back to tilt her slightly. That worked for a week, then she decided it was not good enough, and the crying resumed. Reasoning that supervised tummy time was recommended, I decided I could let her fall asleep on her stomach with me in the room, and turn her over after fifteen minutes, once she had fallen soundly asleep. That worked for another week before she decided it was not good enough.

I am leaving out the agonizing hours of screaming. If you have been through it, you know what it’s like and you don’t need me to describe it. One night, the night I finally gave up, she screamed for four hours and clearly planned to continue. I picked her up every fifteen minutes to soothe her, but the moment I laid her on her back again, the screaming started again.

My baby would not sleep on her back. I do not mean she slept poorly or restlessly. I mean SHE WOULD NOT SLEEP ON HER BACK.

By this point, about six weeks into motherhood, I was so psychotic from lack of sleep that I seriously thought: “I will let her sleep on her tummy, and I will just set my alarm and wake up every fifteen minutes every night so I can make sure she is still breathing.”

That plan needs no further comment.

I let my baby sleep on her tummy. There was nothing else I could do. Please do not give me smug suggestions - I tried everything. Babies have minds of their own, and she had made hers up: tummy-sleeping only.

So I spent JellyBean’s first year, especially those first two-to-four-months when babies are at greatest risk of SIDS, feeling like a murderer. I was so successfully brainwashed by the “Back to Sleep” campaign that I felt guilty all the time. I was a horrible mother. I was ashamed. I knew other mothers would condemn me if they knew this dirty secret, and worst of all, I thought they were right to do it.

My second baby was a better sleeper, and tolerated back-sleeping at first, but by four weeks it was clear that back-sleeping meant she would wake up every 60-90 minutes, but tummy-sleeping meant she would wake up every 3-4 hours. I still laid her down on her back every night, but would let her change position if she protested too much. I had no one to give me a break at night, and with two children to take care of, I had few opportunities to nap during the day. I had to be able to function; so I let Sweetpea sleep on her tummy, too. When she surprised me by rolling over at six weeks, I thought, “Yes! See? She can roll over now. Nothing to worry about.” But I still worried.

When I think about reasons to stop having children, the top of my list is not money or quiet or exhaustion. The top of my list is the gut-wrenching fear and guilt I feel when I try to decide between my baby sleeping on her tummy, or crying on her back. I don’t know how many times I can take the stress of this decision.

The statistics for back-sleeping as a preventative for SIDS are compelling. Babies who sleep on their stomachs are twelve times more likely to suffer unexplained crib death than babies who sleep on their backs. Since the “Back to Sleep” campaign began, SIDS deaths have fallen every year. This does seem to be saving lives. I completely understand doctors like my own stressing the importance of this. I imagine if you are a pediatrician, there is nothing worse than losing a patient to crib death, and whatever steps are necessary to reduce the numbers must be worth it.

The idea of losing a baby to SIDS (or anything else) is starkly terrifying. The idea of being responsible for it (which is in effect what the “Back to Sleep” campaign is saying) is even worse.

What makes me nail-spitting, fist-pounding angry are the smug authorities who pretend that mothers like me let their babies sleep on their tummies only out of selfishness or ignorance. When I was struggling with this decision the first time, I read one doctor who said, when questioned about the way many infants hate to sleep on their backs, “It’s hard to know for sure what babies like since they can’t tell us.” Excuse me? Tell you what, lady, you come spend the night at my house. Every time the baby screams I’ll jab a needle in your foot to wake you, and you can tell me how hard it is to “know what babies like.”

My sister tells me that for mothers of more than three kids, tummy-sleeping is the dirty little secret they lie to their pediatricians about. At a certain point in Jellybean’s infancy, I told my own pediatrician (an attentive and dedicated doctor about whom I have no complaints) that if she kept asking about sleep position I would just lie to her. I think we both breathed a sigh of relief when JellyBean passed the one year mark.

I want to see more exhaustive research on this. SIDS is still so unexplained. But more than that, I want statistical analyses that address back-sleeping more comprehensively. What are the statistical relationships between back-sleeping infants and their parents’ post-partum depression, or domestic abuse, or car accidents? I bet those statistics would be interesting. Somehow I doubt I am the only person who finds this health practice debilitating or impossible.

So now I have another baby due in the spring and I am already tensing up, wondering if I will be able to manage the back-sleeping this time. My husband and my parents and my mom-in-law all look at me with patient, pitying eyes if I talk about it. They think I am a good mother, that I worry too much, and that whatever I decide, the baby will be fine.

But I listen to the bad voices too much, and in my heart of hearts, on the bad days, I feel like a murderer.

More Plumbing Woes

Thursday, November 23rd, 2006

We have a new leak. This time it will be an even bigger job.

Our house is over 100 years old, and still has some original cast iron pipes. One of those original pipes is cracked and must be replaced. When these houses were built, the basement and foundation were laid first, and then the pipes were put in. The cast iron pipes were so heavy, builders added turns and corners to the pipes to allow them to rest on the foundation walls, easing the burden of the weight. One of those pipes - the one that empties our shower - is cracked, and the plumber will have to remove our kitchen cabinets to get back into the corner where it sits on the foundation wall. Ugh. Ugh, ugh, ugh.

And now I will try not to think about this for the weekend. Instead, I will try to be grateful this Thanksgiving for children and love and in-laws healthy enough to visit. It’s not a bad life, really, even with plumbing.

Everything AND the Kitchen Sink

Tuesday, November 21st, 2006

Az the Husband is the only happily married man on his shift. This sometimes means that his coworkers appeal to him to explain women or relationships. He is a terse, phlegmatic man, and his responses are somewhat unpredictable. Too much moaning about the cruelty of women, for instance, may elicit something like: “You know, this job does come with a mental health benefit. Maybe you should use it.”

But last night one of the single guys asked Az how you know when you finally meet your One True Love. Az’s response was brief.

“She’s the woman who stays.”

****************

Sweetpea has begun talking in her sleep. The other night I went in to check on her, and she said, eyes closed, “Go Boom! Boom!” We call it “booming on the bed” when I toss the girls onto their backs and let them bounce on the bed. They giggle and giggle. So apparently she was having a good dream.

I went in last night to check on her, and she spoke in her sleep again. She shrieked, “MINE!”

****************

JellyBean got a birthday card from her Gramma with $20 in it, and we went to the bookstore today to pick out something to buy. She got a fairy book, a firehouse book, and an alphabet activity book. She adored the alphabet book so much that she played with it till quite exhausted. Then we all had a nap. She slept through dinner (it is NOT worth it to wake that child from a nap. You do not know how bad it is until you have experienced it), and finally woke about 7:30.

When she woke up, she had had a rather disgusting accident in bed which required immediate showering and laundering. Poor thing. She stood crying and shaking in the shower as I tried to calm and reassure her. Nothing worked until I said, “You are taking a shower like a big girl. Mommy and Daddy take showers. Babies take baths.” Then she stopped shaking and crying, and her little shoulders straightened up, and she stood proud and dripping.

Tiny little soggy toddler, proud to be growing up. Nothing is more bittersweet.

*****************

We have running water! In case you missed it, we had been living without it in our kitchen for almost two weeks. The plumber came Friday and fixed us up. He also replaced a pvc pipe with a new snazzy brass and chrome one to impress potential buyers, AND he took five percent off his estimate, so we are pretty happy.

I have promised Az a pie in celebration.